The Kitchen is Stressful (especially in the morning)

Ok so here’s the thing, I like to have coffee and breakfast at work when I get in. I know I could do this at home in the privacy of my own apartment but due to The Dreaded Commute it seems best that I make every effort just to get to the office and then I can worry about the rest of it.

So every morning I get in, turn on my computer and go to the kitchen for coffee. PEOPLE IN MY OFFICE: please let me explain something to you. I enter the kitchen to make coffee and it’s VERY, VERY difficult to talk to any of you without consuming coffee. This is where being invisible would be very helpful. I try to get in and out with the least amount of human interaction but inevitably, this happens:

Me: (pouring coffee)
Person Standing There: Hiiii!! How are you??
Me: Fine. You?
Person Standing There: Goooood, good. Gosh this weather is so crazy, right? I mean, it’s soooo hot out there
Me: Yeah, I know
PST: I think it might rain later. Did you hear that? Did you hear if it was going to rain or not later?
Me: Um, I’m not sure. (Looking out the window) it does look like it might rain.
PST: Ugh yeah. Ugh, I hate rain.
Me: (reaching behind PST for milk) ‘scuse me.
PST: Oops! Sorry! So, did you see that email yesterday about alkmvlzxckmoksdhgiowhnvhivokerngi (I’m sure those were real words, it’s just that I hadn’t had COFFEE yet so I can’t UNDERSTAND them).
Me: ummm
PST: I mean, crazy right?
Me :Crazy (backing away slowly towards door). Ok, well have a good day!
PST: Yeahhh, yeah you too!!

Don’t even get me started on the scene around lunchtime.